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Hey fellow Expaters! Enter your email address for useful expat essentials, as well as the latest on my surreal expat life and fun times. Currently based in Santiago, Chile.

Fancy a nationality swap?

Fancy swapping nationalities this month? I’m considering Canadian – modest, understated and cool. Or Switzerland – safe, pacifistic and beautiful. Or Tuvaluan – a nationality hardly anyone has heard of, belonging to a country which will disappear anyway if sea levels continue to rise. Because I’m rather bored of being British right now. Or rather I’m fed up of being held up for Brexit, Gibraltar, the Falklands and pretty much…
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The Hotel That Doesn’t Let You Check Out

Last year I changed my holiday routine. After years of adventurous travel to remote lands, travel has been an escape, an experience, something new and exciting. From bling bling hotels in the city (‘circular disco bath anyone? There’s room for six…’) to eco resorts accessible only by foot or helicopter, from private palaces to public houses, I have always sought something a little different. In…
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Top Five Expat Destinations

I recently decided against a move to Nigeria with my two young kids due to (perhaps unjustified…?) concerns over its crime rate and healthcare. My other half rebuked me for my prejudiced view of a country I haven’t even visited. He continues to rave about the wonders of Lagos – exciting business opportunities, fabulous sunshine and amazing nightclubs. But these aren’t…
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‘Your Wife is Dead? Hoorah!’ And Other Language Mix Ups

Language mix ups have cost me dear; from incorrect food orders, to foot in mouth insensitivity and even a date with the wrong guy. On my first French exchange aged twelve the family asked me what food I liked. I got my vocab muddled and was presented with a tray of unidentifiable shellfish, sea demons and other slimy monsters which I didn’t even…
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Home Not So Sweet Home

You’ve lived abroad for years now. You can just about get by in the lingo but you tire of speaking caveman. ‘Hello. Me from Britain. You come from? To meet you nice’. In any case your kid still corrects your accent. You’re fed up of the bureaucracy, the weather and the shortage of decent lattes within a 100/1000/5000 km radius. And now, finally, it’s…
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